What an amazing time, 2020 has arrived: finalement! I have to admit that 2019 was one of the most life-changing years I have had to date and at the same time, it was filled with challenges, intense emotional experiences, defeat, but most of all opportunity.
On New Year’s Eve, I threw out the question to my family and friends: How was your 2019? Most of them replied with the usual disdain for the time and commented on their challenges without a lot of hope or optimism. I have encountered a lot of people who have the same opinion of that particular year. I have sat with that for a few days now and I must say that I think that when life throws you difficult times and you simply don’t die that you, in fact, become much stronger, more resilient and more importantly a better version of yourself if you manage to see the learning in your circumstance.
Ultimately, Michelle…what the fuck do you want people to take away from your words? Well, I believe that there are many reasons people see things so negatively but one I want to focus on right now is the overwhelming sense of anxiety that we live in today. Our society, unfortunately, is infused with high-performing, competitive, consumeristic, keep up with the Jones’, precarious work inflicted, environmentally traumatized, patriarchal, global warming ridden circumstances. How do we live this way, woke or sleeping, and still see the light side of life? The opportunities, the sunshine, the gratitude, the happiness, the love…are they all just like a unicorn? Magnificent in theory, full of wonder and magic, offering a promise of fulfillment if we get the great chance to meet her, have her or even be her.
You know those people that you encounter that seem so happy and well-adjusted to life, that have a sense of bewonderment and enthusiasm about their reality? You know the ones I speak of? Maybe you are one…but I can promise if you’re not they fuck your mind on the regular. I know they did mine until I became one, well most of the time because let’s face it life is not linear in how we experience it emotionally. Do you know what the common thread is for those folks? They believe, have faith, invest in hope, practice gratitude and most of all they practice this more often than not. Without these traits and behaviors, we cannot endure the dark side of life without becoming overburdened, de-energized, overwhelmed, pessimistic and most of all hopeless. Basically, I am telling you that without actual evidence from past experience you must believe in the Unicorn. She exists dammit, even if you have never seen her with your own eyes. You must believe if you want to experience the light that life has to offer.
Oh my gawd! For any of you non-believers, I am sure you are hearing this as complete quackery and I too have to admit that I was once there and for those of you that know that unicorn you have never seen is real you are praising my words as though they are as right as rain. In my practice of working with leaders, management teams, individual shero’s and experiencing my relationships with family, friends, and colleagues I can say what holds everyone back the most from progressing through their goals is their angst of living in the dark side of life only. Anxiety is a real deal and a total son of a bitch. It puts doubt, and fear and pessimism as a person’s highest valued way of thinking, processing and experiencing life. We could talk about anxiety in a clinical sense here but then all of you undiagnosed folks won’t commit to the reality of my words. We all experience episodes, periods or moments of anxiety…some of us are unlucky enough to experience it more than others. I am talking to all humans here.
Okay, Michelle…now what? What should I do about this anxiety I have and my disbelief in your metaphorical unicorn? It’s simply put you see and challenging to do but worth it and doable. You must work on changing your mind. You have to talk to yourself differently. You need to take a step back and listen to the thoughts inside of your head. Am I thinking things like “can’t, never, won’t, shouldn’t” or do I think “can, always, will, should”? Are my thoughts destroying my goals? If the answer is yes, I am one hell of a negative Nancy and I believe everything that demon says then you must start by changing the dialogue you have with yourself every minute of every day inside of that magnificent mind of yours.
Moving forward the Mantras for 2020 are as follows:
Unicorns are real.
I can do anything.
I am worthy.
My goals are achievable.
I deserve everything I desire.
Don’t ever let anyone, including Nancy, steal that unicorns sunshine. Your hope, faith, and determination are far greater than your anxiety. Don’t let society take that from you. Cheers to a great year ahead and most of all to your health and wellness.